Arsenal 1-2 Watford: HAHAHAHAHAHA

Nope. Not doing this. Not even looking up a picture - this doesn't deserve it.

The Daylight Savings thing and a super-late night coming home from a poker game meant that I DVRed this and had a lie-in. What a brilliant decision that turned out to be, huh? I had stayed away from spoilers right up until Giroud's goal (which was a goal, you fucking cunt of a lino) was pegged back for a phantom offside. Right away my "hiding to nothing" alarm went off, and I went straight to the Guardian for the score.

I wish I could say I was surprised.

It's amazing - after all these years, after all these "lessons learned", we still have Arsenal sides that turn up expecting teams like this to roll over and die because our shirts are red and white. Watford are no mugs, either. They spent a lot of money this off-season, and they have one of those sneaky-good managers that isn't a huge name but who damn sure knows what's up. This isn't a bad team, and they proved it today.

I did actually watch the first half though, and it seemed to be an endless loop of Chambers shanking crosses, Elneny blazing over crossbars from prime scoring areas, and Alexis doing his best Casper impersonation. I didn't even know he was playing until like the 34th minute. But, and I keep coming back to this, compare the general approach to this match compared to the NLD that just passed. I know that a derby is a derby and all, but there are gears between first and hell-bent-for-leather. I'd love to see us try them one day.

Now, fast-forwarding through to the goals. Let's discover the bullshit together, huh?

  1. Bizarro Frank Rijkaard takes a throw-in. Somehow one of their little dudes out-jumps Chambers and Per Mertesacker (I mean, are you serious?). Gabriel allows Ighalo to turn in the area, shot, goal. So easy. So preventable. 
  2. A million guys in the penalty area marking two attackers. Genius. That allows some no-mark loser who we'll never hear of again to stroll in and lash a thunderbastard into the top corner. Great shot but this keeps happening to us because we don't get the basics of defending.
  3. Ahhh the old Arsenal standard, the futile gesture. Nice back-heel by Ozil but frankly a better goalkeeper gets his body in front of Welbeck's finish.

That's it. That's your lot.

Man of the Match: HAHAHAHAHA not today.